Giving Up
by Yotes08
Summary: Instead of jumping Bella waits for Jacob to take her, meanwhile, there is another Victoria murder. Racked with guilt Bella decides to give herself up. Can Alice see her and get there in time? WARNING: DARK THEMES-SUICIDE. Rated for safety.
1. Giving up

**(a/n: WARNING: SUICIDE ATTEMPT. for all those who are waiting for ch 5 of Cedric's return, I'm working on it. this is an attempt to get over my writer's block. Will update both stories as soon as I can. Feel free to PM me if you have questions. Reviews always welcome. Enjoy.)**

**Giving Up**

I seriously think I've lost it. I move to this tiny town and fall in love with a vampire. Not only that, but I got to the point that I considered _his_ family to be _my_ family too. That didn't matter anymore, _he_ was gone, _and they_ were gone.

After they left, I started hanging out with Jacob Black. Our dads have been best friends since before either of us was born. Then all of a sudden, he starts acting very strange. I finally found out what the problem was, Jacob is a werewolf. It was all confusing, isn't there anything normal left in the world? Were all of those legends and superstitions true?

If I was completely honest with myself, I would admit that I hung out with Jacob so that I could keep having my hallucinations of Edward. These hallucinations make me feel alive again, if only for a little while. Whenever I hear Edward it makes me feel like he _does_ care whether or not I live or die. The only problem was, the last words he said to me had canceled that out. I always knew that I didn't deserve his love; but that didn't mean that I didn't _want_ his love.

I am sure that having been in love with such a perfect man had forever changed me. No one would ever be able to compare to him. No one would ever be good enough to make me forget him. There are plenty of guys that I could settle for. Mike Newton had been pining for my attention since I'd moved here. It definitely wouldn't be a problem to get a date if I tried to get one. Then there was Jacob. It was obvious that he liked me. He is constantly flirting with me. I tried to make it clear as nicely as I could that I wasn't interested. I just want him as a friend.

Recently, I've been thinking about whether or not I should just give in. at least I can make him happy. However, that would just be leading him on. I wish I wasn't in this position of needing to be around Jake because he makes me feel better while being around is just teasing him. This can't end well.

It's been a few days since I heard Edward's voice telling me to stop doing something dangerous. Jacob said that he would take me cliff diving today. Hopefully, this will bring on more of the hallucinations.

I head downstairs to call Jacob and tell him that I'm on my way. To my delight, he answered on the first ring.

"Hello," his voice sounds anxious and maybe even a little nervous.

"Hey, Jake. I called to tell you that I'm on my way for cliff diving."

"Oh, Bella. I was about to call you. Sam called us in. I've got to postpone our date."

Wincing at the word "date," I quickly pleaded. "Please Jake, can't you skip this one?"

"Sorry, no."

"Ok, then I'll go cliff diving and you can join me later."

"No!" Jacob suddenly yelled. "You shouldn't go alone. In fact you should probably just stay home today."

"When are you going to be done?"

"Probably real late. I'm not sure what's going on, just that it's important."

"Ok, another time then."

"Yeah, I am sorry Bella."

"It's ok, bye."

"Bye, Bells," Jacob said glumly.

I hung up the receiver and headed into the living room to try to occupy myself. Unfortunately, there weren't any good programs on, so I settled for the news. The top story of the day was another murder early this morning. A ranger heard a woman's scream and ran to help. When he got there it was too late and the killer was nowhere to be seen. The ranger had just enough time to radio it in when he was killed too. By the time they were found, both had been drained of blood.

No one had any clues about how this happened. The police believe that the two were killed somewhere else and moved, because of the blood, or lack thereof. I, on the other hand knew at least almost exactly what happened. The ranger had interrupted a hunting vampire, and became her second victim of the night. I also was sure I knew who did it. Victoria. She's been hunting me for months. Until she gets me, she's going to be killing this area. Was this why Jake had to go today? Was the pack hunting her right now?

The guilt of knowing that I was responsible for everyone of those recent deaths was too much. I needed to get my mind off of it. That was easier said than done. Thinking about Victoria hunting me, reminded me of why she was. That of course, led me to thinking about Edward and the Cullens. This brought on a round of pain from loosing them.

The onslaught of anguish took my breath away. I turned the television off and buried my face in my hands. All of this is my fault. If I had been more careful at my party, Jasper wouldn't have lost control and the Cullens would still be here.

If I would have just given up to Victoria, she would be far from here. Maybe that's exactly what I should do. All these people are dying or are in danger of dying because of me. If I weren't around I wouldn't be complicating Edward's life anymore either.

I just can't do this anymore. I've tried for seven months to live without him. To keep it together for Charlie, Renée and even Phil. Little by little, it has drained me of all my strength, and I don't have any left. I just can't do this.

In a last ditch attempt to get myself under control, I tried to call Jake again. The phone rang and rang, over and over. When the machine picked up, I hung up. This wasn't working. I could ignore Jake's request for me to stay put and go induce my own hallucinations. A small voice in the back of my head warned me that I would just be back in this same position tomorrow. All the while, innocent people are dying and it's my entire fault. I can't let this go on.

Taking a deep breath, I head for the drawer where the message pad is kept. I take it out along with a pen and sit down at the kitchen table. Slowly, I begin to write.

_ Charlie,_

_ I'm sorry. I can't explain how, but all of the recent deaths are my fault. I didn't kill them, but they were killed because of me. _

_ I've tried to move on, but I can't. Everything pilling up has drained me in every way. I don't have the strength to keep going. None of this is your fault, or anyone else's, just mine. I can't be sure, but I think that these deaths will stop soon. _

_ I'm so sorry for doing this to you. But, I don't have any other options. Thank you for everything you have ever done for me. You are the greatest. Please tell mom that I'm sorry and that I love her._

_ All my Love, _

_ Bella_

I finished the letter and set it on the table under a salt shaker so he'd find it. Then I got up and started for the door after grabbing a knife from the drawer. I locked the door and walked towards the woods where Victoria was hunting. I was going to end this today.


	2. Stop Her!

**Stop Her!**

**APOV**

Everyone is miserable. Carlisle rarely smiles. Esme doesn't hum any melodies. Emmett looks like he will never be happy again. Jasper is depressed, partially because he blames himself, and also because of all of the depressing emotions around him. I feel bad for my husband, having to deal with the burden of all those feelings in addition to his own. He is always attempting to at least take the edge off of everyone's sadness, especially mine.

I had lost my best friend. I wasn't even allowed to check up on her to make sure she was alright. Ever since I made that promise- to stay out of Bella's life- I had regretted it. Rosalie's even depressed, although that's mostly because she doesn't like to see Emmett sad.

My brother is a stubborn idiot. I told him that leaving would be a bad idea. We had one of the worst fights ever when he announced that it was over. I knew- and still do know that Bella would not be able to handle us leaving. She loves us, all of us.

Right now, we are all visiting Tanya, Kate, Irina, Carmen and Eleazar in Denali; all of us except Edward. He is off in Brazil tracking Victoria. He is determined to catch her in retaliation for her and James hunting Bella last year. He's still in love with Bella, but he just won't admit it. Not even to him.

So all of us have spent the last seven months moping around; there's nothing that can totally take our minds off of our situation. I really have been trying to keep my promise to Edward. However, I didn't even get to explain and say good-bye. Edward did that for me, though not as I would have.

He was mean, telling her that he wasn't in love with her anymore. Telling her that his feelings were now completely platonic like I said, total idiot.

Right now, Carlisle and Esme are hunting; Emmett and Rosalie went to a movie in Juneau. Jasper and I are at Tanya's house hanging out. Tanya's family are on their hunting trip for the week, they'll be back the day after tomorrow. Sitting around here with nothing to do only causes us to mull over what's bothering us. This, of course leads us to thinking about Edward and Bella. Jasper senses my mood and tries to cheer me up some. I smile and kiss his cheek. I know he just wants to help; but there's only so much you can do when your depressed yourself.

We tried to pass the time by watching a movie, but every few seconds our memories would be triggered again as if on a set timer. After trying to concentrate though two movies, I simply conceded to curl up on Jasper's lap and stare into oblivion. I didn't try to have any visions, they don't always come when I want or expect them to. One minute I was snuggled into Jazz's arms moping, and the next. I was staring at a very familiar figure in an equally familiar place. Without summoning it, I was having a vision about Bella. I knew this was against what Edward wanted, since he'd make me promise that I wouldn't look into Bella's future anymore. However, this wasn't my fault, I can't always control these things.

At first, I was relieved to see Bella again. But then, I saw that she looked terrible. She'd lost weight, and lots of it. There were dark circles under her eyes. She looked similar to a zombie or something. My horror grew as the vision progressed. I could hear Jasper asking me what was happening. He could feel what I was feeling, and it was scaring him. The images I saw next will haunt me for eternity. Bella was holding a knife. She was crying. Then I saw where hse was going, the coast. Once there, she was going to wait for Victoria then use the knife to tempt Victoria into killing her.

I couldn't believe it, Bella was going to try to kill herself. Her depression had gotten so deep that this was the course of action that she chose. I searched for a time line. Bella was writing her suicide note to Charlie. It would take her a couple of hours at least to get to the chosen location walking. We had to move fast, now, if we are going to get to Bella before Victoria finds her.

I know that this will be easer if we have the others helping us. I automatically began searching for when everyone will get home. Rose and Emmett will be here in ten minutes and I can hear Carlisle and Esme now. I leaped out of Jasper's arms and bolted out of the door, Jazz right on my heels.

Once they saw us, Carlisle and Esme sped up. They both reached us in two seconds.

"Alice? What is it?" Carlisle asked, dreading the answer.

"Edward?" Esme questioned, just as scared.

I shook my head, "Bella."

"What did you see, Alice?" Jasper commanded.

"She is writing a note as we speak, a suicide note. Victoria has been in Forks, hunting Bella. Bella… is going to give herself up to her."

"No!" Esme screamed. "Why?"

"I don't know exactly, except that she's given up trying to live without Edward. I don't know what triggered it."

"Is there time to stop her?" Carlisle whispered.

"If nothing changes about her plans. She's walking to the coast. She has a knife to tempt Victoria. It will take her a few hours to her there on foot. If Victoria intercepts her though, we're finished."

"Can you see what Victoria is doing?" inquired Jazz.

"It will take her a while to get there, she's been running Edward around. We've got a decent chance."

"Jasper, call Emmett and tell him to hurry home to join us," Carlisle told Jasper.

Nodding, Jasper whipped out his phone and called Rosalie. "Rose, tell Em that he needs to really step on it."

"Why?" Rosalie asked.

"Bella's in trouble, she needs help. We'll explain later, just hurry up."

"Fine."

Jasper snapped the phone shut. I closed my eyes to see when they would get here. Emmett had definitely gotten the message, he was hurrying. They'll be her in two minutes.

"They're almost here, come on!" I yelled.

We all raced for the Mercedes and got in. Carlisle pulled out of the garage and waited on the driveway for Emmett and Rosalie. Right on time, we heard the roar of the Jeep's engine coming down the back road to the house. In an instant, we were off. Racing against time, we headed for Forks.


	3. Race

**Race**

Both cars sped down the highway at breakneck speeds. Most drivers would take a day or two to drive from Juneau to Seattle, but we don't have nearly that long. We only slowed down when we reached the boarder. I looked ahead and saw that the only thing that had changed was that Bella was closer to her goal. That was a relief. I then switched tactics and looked for Victoria. She was on her way back to Forks form somewhere in Central America, but she was still a long way off. If things kept going like they are, we'll make it before Victoria. Hopefully, Bella doesn't decide to kill herself anyway.

We got through the boarder crossing into Canada without incident and headed for the Washington boarder. After another half hour of high speed driving, we finally reached the boarder crossing back into the U.S. The officers at the posts were waiting to ask questions to random cars to catch smugglers. Slowly, we made our way to the front of the line. I immediately saw that we were going to be one of the randomly chosen cars.

"Papers please?" the officer asked Carlisle politely.

"Here you go," her replied passing over all of our passports. "The other two are in the car behind us."

"Okay." He handed Emmett and Rosalie's passports to another officer who went to check them. The first patrolman looked through our elaborate fake passports. After a moment, he handed them back. "What brought you to Canada, sir?"

"We're just passing through, coming from Juneau."

"Good, we're just going to run the dog around once for safety then you should be on your way."

"Thank you."

The dog was not at all keen on going anywhere near either car. "Jasper, see if you can help." He did his best, considering he wasn't used to manipulating animal emotions. We made it through the inspection and were off. It would take another hour at our present speed to reach Forks. Again, I looked for Bella's progress. She was nearing the halfway point to the coast. She was walking faster that normal in her quest to die, if we merely keep Victoria from getting her, that won't stop her. Bella will continue to try to kill herself until she succeeds. We need to make her want to live again. There is only one person who can do that. Edward. He has to put a stop to this. The problem with that is, he doesn't answer my calls. He's tired of me pestering him to come home. The only person that can, without fail get him on the phone is, Esme.

"Esme, you need to call Edward. I just saw that stopping Bella today isn't good enough, she'll keep trying. Edward is the only one who can stop her. And you're the only one he'll answer for now."

Esme nodded and pulled out her cell. She quickly dialed Edward and waited. He answered on the second ring.

**EdwardPOV  
**I can't believe Victoria got away again! There's no way she doesn't have some kind of help. Right now, I'm in Rio de Janeiro sitting on a park bench trying to figure out my next move. I'm starting to think that Victoria is gifted in getting away from danger.

Like clockwork, my mind goes wondering about Bella. I hope she forgave me for leaving her like I did. There was just no other option that I could see. I _want_ to go back, run to her and beg for her to take me back. Yeah, like that will ever happen. I've hurt her, I told her that I wasn't in love with her anymore. Basically, I told her that it had been fun but I was tired of her and wanted something better. _That_ was the blackest kind of lie that had ever come out of my mouth.

I loved her, and still do. She is the one that I want for all of eternity. However, choosing me would be settling. She could do so much better. I'm not better off without her, but she _is_ better off without me. And she is what counts. She deserves better than me.

Maybe, I could go back, just to check up on her and make sure that she's okay. See that she's happy and moving on with her life. The problem is, would I be able to leave again? I didn't have to think about that for long- No. There's the answer to that- I can't go back.

It was nearing noon in Rio, normally I wouldn't be able to stay outside, but today is raining and I can do what I want. Right now, that includes staring at all of the couples walking around, huddled under umbrellas, totally in love. This only depressed me more, missing my sweet Bella.

My phone rang in my back pocket I hesitated and reached back to retrieve it. I looked at the caller i.d. and saw that it was Esme. I answered right away. "Hello."

"Edward, where are you?" There was something wrong in her voice. Something had happened.

"Rio, what's wrong?" I was starting to panic.

"Edward, sweetheart, you need to come home. Bella's in trouble. Victoria's been hunting her, and she's decided to give herself up. Please, baby, come home."

"What do you mean, give herself up? I thought Victoria was here in Brazil."

"Alice said that Victoria went as far as Central America then turned around. Victoria has been killing people in Forks for months. Bella knows this and has decided that she wants to die. We're trying to get to her first, but you're the only one who can stop her from trying again."

"But Bella wouldn't do that, she moved on, got over it. She would never kill herself." Now, I was sobbing. What have I done?

"Please come back. She still wants you. It's not too late, just come home."

"I… I… I'm coming."

"Thank you, hurry. We'll keep her safe until you talk to her."

"Bye, Mom."

"Bye, baby."

I hung up and got up to hail a taxi cab. Once inside I told them that I needed to get to the international terminal. In a few minutes time, I was sitting on a plane on my way to Seattle. All I could do was wait and pray that my family would get to her in time. I still can't believe that Bella could ever be in a position where suicide looks like the best choice to make.

**APOV**

Esme had finished the call to Edward. Finally, he was doing something intelligent, he was coming home. A little over half an hour after crossing over into Washington we reached Port Angeles. It would take only 15-20 more minutes and we would be entering the town limits of Forks.

I looked ahead to see where Bella was and relieved to see that she was another hour and a half away from her destination. Finding her would be easy, she had started out on foot from in front of her house. That's where we would begin our search. After checking on Bella, I looked for Victoria. She was in Colorado, on her way to Forks. Once she got here, she was going to start hunting Bella again.

"We're going to make it. She's on foot and still over an hour away from the coast. We need to track her scent from her house. Victoria is in Colorado, but is on her way."

"We'll find her, don't worry," Carlisle said as soothingly as he could, considering the reason that we were going back.

In another 7 minutes, we crossed through the Forks town limits. Our speed slowed considerably, it wouldn't help if we got pulled over. We went straight for Bella's house. I sighed in relief when I finally saw that familiar home nestled into the forests of Washington State.

**A/N: At the beginning of the story, Bella hears of another killing in the area, that was a different vampire hunting in the area. thank you for being so patient with me. Up until this point, I have been working on my stories and my school work. I am finally finished with college and can focus more time on work and my fan fictions instead of all three. I hope to update again soon. Thanks. Sarah:)**


	4. Tracking

**Tracking**

Carlisle and Emmett parked the cars on the next block down from Bella's house so that, if Charlie came back early, he wouldn't get suspicious. We then all got out and walked hastily to the trees. Once in the woods, we broke into the run back to Bella's house to catch the trail.

"I've got it," Jasper called indicating the start of Bella's scent all of us gathered there to catch it.

"Okay, I think will make it but we still need to hurry. She could choose to speed things up at any moment," I said. And with that, we were off.

Continually as we ran, I would check on Bella's future. The long-term was nearly black. However, right now, she had not altered her plans.

"Why exactly is Bella going to the coast? Why not just do this somewhere else?" Rosalie asked while we ran.

"So that she'll have multiple options right there; if the knife doesn't work, she's planning on diving head-first over the edge," this was met with a gasp and a sob from Esme.

We ran for another couple of minutes, Bella's scent was getting stronger. It wasn't very much further until we would catch up to her. After another hundred yards, we could hear her. She was stumbling on her way to her death.

"All I can get from her is determination, guilt, and pain," Jasper called to the rest of us. Esme ran ahead to get to her before she could do something stupid-other than attempting suicide at all.

Finally, we came through a cluster of evergreens and there she was. She hadn't seen us yet, and that is a good thing. It's too likely that if she saw us coming, she would shove the knife into her heart.

**BPOV**

It couldn't be that much further. Hopefully, Victoria would leave Forks as soon as she had me. This just can't go on all of those people dying and it's all my fault. Soon, I wouldn't be a nascence to him anymore. He could go on and live his immortal life without having me there to drag him down. He and his family could move back to Washington and not have to see me anymore.

My hands were sweaty and scraped from all of the times that I fell down. I want to get to the cliffs so that I will have another option if the knife doesn't work. Part of my mind hones in on the fact that I'm not alone, but I don't care. I can end everything before anyone could get to me.

Suddenly, I felt like someone was coming up behind me. I brought the knife up to plunge it into my chest, but something stops my arm from moving. Whatever it is, it's strong and cold. Vampire. Victoria found me faster than I thought she would. She pulls me to the ground and I see a white hand reach out to take the knife.

There was a ring on this hand, it had a crest emblazoned on it-Cullen. Realizing that this was not Victoria, and that they were trying to stop me, I began to struggle against the iron grip around me. She wouldn't let go. I looked down at her hands and saw a bracelet with the same crest- Esme's bracelet. They were trying to stop me-why I didn't know. Didn't they realize that it was pointless to keep going? Why did they want me to stay?

I was vaguely aware that Esme was trying to soothe me, but I didn't really hear her. I was busy figuring out a way to end my life. It was obvious that they weren't going to give me the knife back, and they'd catch me if I made a run for it. I would just have to bide my time.

**Esme POV**

Bella struggled for a couple of minutes then she finally began to settle down. Maybe now we can set all of this straight and stop her from any further attempts on her own life. Slowly, Bella relaxed enough that she started to cry. I just sat on the forest floor and tried to calm her.

"Shh, you're okay," I kept saying while rubbing her back. After a few more minutes we decided to head home. Carlisle came over to us and carefully picked Bella up. I stood up and we ran back to our house on the outskirts of Forks. Emmett and Jasper went to get the cars and take them to the house too. Once we got there, Carlisle carried Bella to Edward's room to lie down. I stayed in with her while he went to get his supplies to check Bella out. I know that we could not leave her alone for fear that she would attempt to kill herself again. In the last few minutes Bella had reduced herself to crying quietly.

"Bella, sweetheart, how are you feeling?" I asked, smoothing her hair. I was hoping to get her to talk to me, but all she did was shrug her shoulders. A few minutes of silence later, Carlisle knocked on the doorframe and came up to us will his medical supplies.

"Bella, are you hurt?" Carlisle asked quietly.

"No," Bella finally spoke.

"How are you feeling?"

"I don't know."

"Did you fall down; I see that your palms are scraped."

"I guess I did."

"Bella, are you alright?" he asked, trying to get her to open up to us.

"I guess."

I sighed and looked up at my husband. I never realized just how depressed Bella would get. We all sat in silence for a few moments worrying about just how hard it would be to get the old Bella back. Bella hadn't really said anything this whole time.

"Why?" Bella suddenly asked.

"Sorry?" Carlisle asked, confused.

"Why did you stop me?"

"Bella why wouldn't we? We don't want anything to happen to you," I told her. It didn't seem like she believed us. Edward is the only hope to put her back to her old self.

"Call if you need anything." I nodded and her got up I left the room.


	5. Flight

**Flight**

**Edward POV**

I still can't believe that Bella would ever try to kill herself. That is so unlike her. She is always worrying about others. Things really must be bad if she's willing to cause Charlie and Renée to have to bury her. Bella would be more concerned about how Charlie would feed himself if she were gone. I know the answer to that one, he wouldn't. Charlie never really showed it, but he adored Bella. If she died, it would literally kill him.

I also know that Charlie would not be happy if he saw me. There's no way he would let me near her. It's not as if I don't deserve it. I left her with out any contact all this time. Not only has she had no contact with me, but she has also had no contact with my family either.

For the last three hours I have been as patient as I could to give my family time to get to Bella. Finally, I could take it no longer, and grabbed the phone from the seat in front of me. Quickly, I dialed the number to my father's cell phone. He answered right away.

"Edward, I would have called your cell but you have it off. Bella's at our house. Esme reached her just in time before she did something drastic."

I couldn't help but sigh in relief. "Is she… how is she?"

"Physically, she's fine. However, I do mean in the injury department. She's lost weight, too much. It appears that she hasn't been sleeping too well. The only injuries I saw were some shallow scrapes on her hands from falling.

"The main problem right now is, mental. Bella is severely depressed. The main thin she has said so far was, asking us why we bothered to stop her from plunging that knife into her chest. Evidently, she is convinced that we and or everyone want her dead."

That hit me like a ton of bricks. Bella had taken me too seriously that day in the woods beside her house. I have got a lot of explaining to do when I get home. "I'm on my way, just don't let her out of sight so she can't try again."

"We aren't. Esme with her now; Alice is planning a cover story for Charlie so he doesn't get too suspicious."

"I'll see you soon."

"Alright, Emmett is planning on picking you up. Alice said that there was going to be some sun tomorrow."

"Bye."

"Bye."

I hung up the phone and sat back in my seat. Finally, I was able to relax a little knowing that my love was safe in my mother's arms. Soon, I hope, Bella will allow me to hold her safely in my around again. Unfortunately, I do believe that I have simply done too much damage to be given that gift. Instead, I decided to pretend, daydream that Bella was with me again. In this way I would pass the time for the rest of my journey.

**BPOV**

Esme was still here with me. I guessed that she would not leave me alone here. Obviously, I wouldn't be allowed to carry out my plans. Though, I will hopefully get a chance to be alone to try. Maybe, I can get a chance to go into the restroom and try there. I do know that I will have to be quick. It's not likely, but hopefully, there is a razor or something in there that I can use.

During my brainstorming for ideas, there was a light knock on the door. A second later, Alice walked into the room. Now, I remember that Alice can see people's choices and their futures. She must have been watching me. Alice must have seen my future of stabbing myself with that knife.

"Bella, how are you? I've missed you." I didn't answer. I missed her too, but I was angry that she would stop me from doing something so necessary. For a second, I considered asking her why she had come back, but decided not to. Of course, it didn't matter, Alice saw my decision and answered anyway.

"Bella!" she gasped. "Why would we want you dead? How could we not come back? How could we not stop you from trying to kill yourself?" she waited for the answer that she would not get. Sighing, she continued, "We love you, all of us. Don't you believe me? What exactly did Edward say to you that day? What was it that made you believe that we think that the world would be a better place without you in it?" again, she waited. "Answer me!"

I couldn't, the pain form hearing _his _name was like pouring acid over my already throbbing heart. I started to gasp for air. Esme quickly realized that I couldn't breathe and called for Carlisle. He was here within three seconds. All three of them tried to calm me down. I was relieved when my vision started to blur. Maybe, this is finally killing me. I welcomed the darkness and allowed it to overtake me.

**EdPOV**

I spent the majority of the flight staring off into space. When the plane touched down in San Antonio, I came back to reality just long enough to get from one plane to another. I was vaguely aware that the stewardess was trying to get my attention when I first boarded the flight to Seattle. Her hope was in vain, she wasn't ugly, but I was biased. She was hoping that I would pay attention to her but, that just will not happen. Bella has always been, and will always be the most important person in the world to me. Eventually, the stewardess gave up and started to pay attention to the other passengers instead.

In my head, the flight was pleasurable. I didn't allow myself to think about the reason that I was going back right now. No, I just fantasized about how it could have been if I hadn't been an idiot and left her in the first place. Soon I would see Bella for myself and be able to reach out and touch her. There was an overwhelming sense of relief that my mother had gotten to Bella in time. But, Bella is stubborn, she won't quit trying until she is successful at what she wants to do.

I spent the next few hours waiting to arrive in Seattle. When the flight arrived, the sun was starting to rise over the horizon. It would be completely visible in about half an hour. Carlisle had said that it would be sunny, and that Emmett would pick me up. So, I started to make my way down to the pickup location to meet up with my brother.

I pinpointed Emmett's thoughts without much trouble. _I get why you left, but I am so tempted to kick your ass._ I sighed, he was completely right of course. I deserved all of it. Emmett wasn't usually so serious, but he is always serious when it comes to the safety of his family, and to Emmett, Bella is as good as his little sister. It hurt me to know that I had taken her away from my entire family. My actions didn't just hurt Bella and myself, this hurt countless people. Those that had to see her so depressed, and those that I didn't allow to see her at all.

Quickly, I made my way to where Emmett was waiting. _Damn, you look nearly as bad as she does._ Emmett was comparing how Bella and I looked. I flinched at he image of Bella curled unresponsively in Esme's arms. We got into the Mercedes and pulled into traffic.

"Hurry up and drive," I told him, wishing that I was the one behind the wheel so that I could drive as fast as I wanted.

"Okay, hang on," Without another word, we were speeding down the highway. _Bella's fine you know, Esme won't let her out of sight_.

"She's still suicidal, isn't she?"

"Yeah," Emmett conceded with a grimace.

The thought that Bella was still attempting to take her own life made me nauseous. We spent the rest of the drive in silence. I wanted to ask him to show me what happened when they found Bella, but I wasn't sure that I could handle it. After twenty minutes, we started to cross into the small town of Forks.

"Is Bella at her house?"

"No, Carlisle called Charlie and gave the excuse that she was sick and offered to let him and Esme take care of her."

I nodded, and lapsed back into silence. Finally, we turned onto our driveway. It would only be a few more moments until I would see Bella with my own eyes again. My mind was bombarded with the thoughts of my family. They were worried about Bella, but happy that I was home. Before Emmett even stopped the car, I was out and was looking into the smiling face of my father.

"Edward," Carlisle said swallowing me into a hug. "She's in your room with your mom." I nodded and ran upstairs.


End file.
